Poetry  October 2011 | issue 430

As A Boy

by Eric Anderson

ERIC ANDERSON’s poetry was recently published at Conte Online. He still doesn’t have a title for his forthcoming collection of poems, and the situation is becoming desperate. He lives in Elyria, Ohio.

my two favorite toys were a stuffed rabbit,

            British grey and glass eyed, and a raggedy

monkey I called “Monkum” because my tongue

and throat strangled my words.
 

                        One flu-fevered night I soaked

the rabbit in vomit, and      

                         I never loved him as much

again — no fault of his, just

unlucky cuddling. As for Monkum


he fell to puppy teeth a year later,

            though I was done with him by then,

partly because I had learned

some bright idea of manliness,

            but mostly because I was embarrassed by

                        the name I had given him.


                        Still, when I saw the stuffing

            shredded out of him, a shameful

urge to cry came over me. Just fluff

            gone yellow with age.
 

How obvious was the lie that he’d ever been alive.

How easily I’d abandoned love.

What chance do the small things of the world have?
 

If you heard my voice today,

I would sound like everyone else.

 

 

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