A Poem By
An Attorney Sticking Up For
Maligned Brown Bears
There are poems
About Brown Bears
—walking on two feet—
—eating cookies—
There are scenes:
A murderous Brown Bear
Devouring little girls
With pony tails
And flowered dresses

These poems are bad
Bad for Brown Bears
Bad for their character
Bad for their reputation
Brown Bears resent
“Brown Bear” poems

And demand the substitution
Of “Polar” or “Black”
Or “Dwarf” or “not-real”
Or “surely not a Brown Bear”
For Brown Bear
In all these poems

Brown Bears are easy-going
But they feel they are
Unjustly maligned
And they peacefully ask
For retribution.

                                Yours truly,
                                Brown Bears


You May Say This Is Prose But It Is Not.
It Is Brown Bear Poetry.


Brown Bear
I have a friend
Who is a Brown Bear
He is thick
And he 1eads me to
The cookie jar
He likes mud-pies
And molasses
And standing
On just two feet
Sometimes he walks
The day away
And when I come home
From a stay at school
He smiles and
Hands me a wet cookie
He puts a big pad
On my shoulder
Saying Brown Bear things to me
And I feel good.
Knowing that BROWN BEAR is happy
And my friend
Brown Bear’s Relationship With Little Girls
Little Susie is three
And wears flowered dresses
And black shoes
Little Susie is three
And romps down the hall
Her pony tails flailing
Her face wrapped up
In a grin
Little Susie is three
And has made friends
He holds her
On his lap
And messes her hair
Three-year-old Susie
Sticks her fingers up
BROWN BEAR’s snout
And pulls his hair
Rolls his eyes
Little Susie is three
But will not be four
Brown Bear Baking
As our relationship grew
BROWN BEAR took it upon himself
To do
All the cooking
All the eating
And all the dishes afterwards

Thanks to BROWN BEAR
The apartment was ordered
And except for traces of
BROWN BEAR shedding
The furnishings were spotless

It was easy to see
That I was completely satisfied
And once
After a large meal
(BROWN BEAR had had)
I asked him:
“Do Brown Bears void in the woods?”

BROWN BEAR removed his apron
And tossed his baking cap on the counter
He put his paws
On either side of his bulky torso
And he said:

“I slave all day
In this shoe-box apartment,
I never go out
I have no friends
I want a career
I want fulfillment
I want boo, hoo
And you can say that to me?”

Broke down and truly cried
He ran into his room
And slammed the door
I heard his bed springs complain
As he flung his body down

I cleaned off the table
And later,
When I walked past
I heard him hibernating
Brown Bear Dilemma
Was depressed
Big tears ran out of his eyes
And matted his thick brown fur
And a big paw rubbed
The space between his droopy ears
“What’s the matter BROWN BEAR?”
I asked him.
BROWN BEAR only shook his head
He hid his eyes under his paws
“It’s nothing,” BROWN BEAR said.
I stroked BROWN BEAR’s big shoulder
“Of course there’s something
Bothering you, BROWN BEAR
Why else would you be so glum?”
BROWN BEAR raised his head
But only stared at his limp paws.
“It can’t be all that bad,”
I said.
“I ate Susie,” BROWN BEAR sobbed.
“Little Susie?” I groaned.
BROWN BEAR’s face collapsed
Into his thick furry arms
I got up and paced the room
“We have a problem, BROWN BEAR.”
Brown Bear Gets The Chair
BROWN BEAR looked small
In the chair
The hood covered his face
And his ears stuck out
Of two cut holes
BROWN BEAR clenched
And then unclenched
And then clenched
His paws
“I don’t want to die.”

“Of course not,”
Said the pale man
And then he
Dropped the switch
I looked away
As the electricity
Tufts of brown hair
Crackled in the air

Even after the power was off
No one would go near